The Ice Cream Man Must Die

When I first started this blog, it was the “Rants” section of my Web site. After one to many “you’re trying to brainwash our children” comments (no, I’m not kidding), I moved from ranting to the much more tranquil (and mundane) “musings”. I think that it’s time to resurrect The Rant.

With the weather getting warmer out, the ice cream man has started making regular trips up and down the street in our area. These trips happen fairly regularly between 7:30 and 8PM at night. Trying to take some of the burden off of Kate, I’ve been trying to put Simon to sleep at right about those times some nights. Normally this wouldn’t be a problem. But our ice cream man drives up and down our block playing a cheesy version of Turkey in the Straw LOUD ENOUGH TO MAKE YOUR EARS BLEED. No, seriously. Way too loud. Tonight it was at 8:00. It woke Simon up. I’d just gotten him to sleep. Man, was I pissed.

Now obviously I don’t want the ice cream man to really die. I mean, then where would all the children in our neighborhood get their 8 O’CLOCK SUGAR FIX! Does this seem odd to anybody else? Might he consider an earlier time, where children’s parents are more likely to let them buy ice cream and other diabetic-shock-inducing sweets from his vast inventory?

So no dying. But an earlier schedule would be nice. Or maybe warmer weather that forces me to turn on the air conditioning and close the windows. *sigh*

Update: Kate wants full credit for recognizing Turkey in the Straw. Who am I to not give credit where credit is due?

4 thoughts on “The Ice Cream Man Must Die

  1. Would you prefer he come right BEFORE dinner? I mean, he’s trying to make a living, and you would deny him that??? Seriously, though, I’m totally sketched out by the ice cream man. Do they do background checks on those people? Does anyone know of a time when you would let your child take money up to a complete stranger in a van???

  2. Kevin, that is FREAKING DISTURBING.

    Carrie, I’m actually surprised that Stephen King didn’t write a sequel to “It” (which featured a clown as the monster) that had the Ice Cream Man as the horrific villain.

  3. Oh, and yesterday he shook it up and played “Pop Goes the Weasel”. Fun.

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